dying

i am running out of life. Each day, I am ticking closer to my last breath, and It could be any day now and I will have it. Sometimes, I fear that the last breath is tomorrow, or even around the corner. Will I wake up in the morning, or have a stroke on the way to the bathroom, choke on a piece of steak? It could be slow, like a cancer, or SARS or many of the famous virii. Realistically, the odds are against me and I don't know if the next breath is the last, or even if this inhale is it. Maybe it won't come right away, and I will die in my early forties. Even if I don't die until my 80th's birthday, it will come soon enough, and by some means I will have my last breath because its inevitable. It's the one certainty in life.

What should I do? If i had a week to live, What would i do? so here goes my list.

*Things to do 1 week before i die*
1. Get on the next plane to New orleans, my final destiny (in my lucid dream.)
2. Spend time with those i love, my family, my bull.
3. Write down important thoughts about my life, my past, things worth remembering. (just to convince myself that i did have a life before.)
4. Seek out people that i have wronged and try to make things right.
5. Spend time in prayer, building faith, repent to christ as to cover past mistakes?

Counting the choices, there are so many things i can do in 1 week before i die. but how come i never take the initiative to do those things now instead of waiting until the last week of my life? then, would my life have less regret and more worthy to be lived? would my life be different?

There are so many ways to spend my life, but who chooses complacency, until the last resort? If i try and try, and then fail, would i give up? would i give up the second time? What if the third time was the charm and i stopped at the second attempt?

The thing is there are how many 'third time' in my life?

Think about the time i have, and know that tomorrow is coming, and soon, so soon that the next moment is now. And the next moment is now. And the next moment is now. And the last moment could be now.