Book review: The fifth Mountain

English is always a secondary language for me. Its not that its less important or less of priority compare to my mother tongue (Chinese of course), but if the 'ease' of using the language is the yardstick, i have to say that English always comes second.

I read from Manglish's post "On Writing" a few days before:

"it is hard to compose in Chinese inside our head and then write in English. We are perpetually seeking the right word to convey the right feeling."

That was exactly my 心声.

Here comes the perfect example, When the Chinese word 心声 came naturally to me, my fingers which were reflexively typing on the keyboard stopped momentarily in the air. The word supersedes the rest of all other English adjectives. So like what Manglish mentioned, i was 'Perpetually seeking the right word (in English) to convey the right feeling (which i can do it effortlessly in Chinese)'.

**心声 means the voice of your heart, sometimes when you cant find the right words and during that time a person speaks the same thoughts you had, its as though the person heard the voice of your heart.

(After a moment of re collection) Let me rephrase myself again.

That was exactly what's on my mind. (but again, there is sort of reduction in the intensity and emotion which i attempt to express here).

I am always aware of the fact that i am a Chinese who is speaking English. Not that its difficult, but its a constant awareness whereby the linguistic part of my brain have to work extra hard in putting the sentence together, finding the right vocabularies, right grammar. And my research project's mentor used to tell me that unless i am thinking in 'English' i can never 驾驭 (ok, the clostest i can think of the word for this is 'mastering') the language.

I only started to speak English after i've met Peter (i think its around my final year of college studies, dont ask me why, i never find the need of speaking the language before that), of course the command of the languge was accelerated during my days in UK. However, i do aware that i am far from conquering it. In fact, if i count the years i've actively communicate and interact with others using English, it was only a short 5 years, which basically makes me not only a amatuer, but a kid in the world of English.

However in this short 5 years, i have found immense joy in using the language, especially in reading. Although Chinese vocabulary is rich, English is equally great. For example 'Serendipity', the way chinese would describe it is "美丽的意外", but it doesnt sound as beautiful as 'serendipity', in fact, a single word "疲惫” has so many parallel word in English, "tired, exhaust, fatigue, weary, lassitude, feeble, prostration, debilitation, enervation" which can be used in different context with explicit meaning.

I had just finished reading "The fifith mountain" by Paulo Coelho recently. It was a not-so-biblical story based on an Old Testiment's prophet called Elijah in the bible. The book describes the "word" as one of the most powerful weapons of destruction. During that time highest priest is the only one who has the privilage to inherit the history of a nation, of which they passed from mouth to mouth, generation by generation. When, the 'alphabet' was introduced by Merchant to the country and was slowly being practiced by the layman, the high priest decided to declare war and destroy its own nation in order to prevent the spread of the language.

Daggers and spears left traces of blood; arrows could be seen at a distance. Poisons were detected in the end and avoided… but the word managed to destroy without leaving clues.-Paulo Coelho

How true it is.

Anyway, highly recommended book. (*Warning, read it as a story, without any religious presumptions, it can be mind provoking as Coelho described the liberation and thinking of ownself are important in one's relationship with God and His calling)

A timeless message from the book which i really love.

Every man hath the right to doubt his task, and to forsake it from time to time; but what he must not do is forget it. Whoever doubteth not himself is unworthy –for in his unquestioning belief in his ability, he commiteth the sin of pride. Blessed are they who go through moments of indecision.