On being twenty-something to thirty something

"On being Twenty-Something to Thirty-Something. They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis." It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are a lot of things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you do not realize is that they are realizing that too and are not really cold or catty or mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you. You look at your job. It is not even close to what you thought you would be doing or maybe you are looking for one and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and are scared.

You miss the comforts of college, of groups, of socializing with the same people on a constant basis. But then you realize that maybe they weren't so great after all. You are beginning to understand yourself and what you want and do not want. Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging a bit more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and add things to your list of what is acceptable and what is not.

You are insecure and then secure. You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you or you lay in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough to get to know better. You love someone but maybe love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you are not a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap and getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.

You go through the same emotions and questions over and over and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans and money and the future and making a life for yourself and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! What you may not realize is that everyone reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

PS:Life should not be measured by the number of breaths you take BUT by the moments that take your breath away."



atlantisian: Read this i-dunno-who-wrote-this-article yesterday, give me a headache afterwards, cuz' i think i had this 'Quarter-life phobia' sort of thing as well. But then, ciest la vie... guess it's just a transformation period that i have to go through, better days are coming... (i mean after Dr wong's damned Food chemistry paper.)

Prev: What kind of soul are you?
Next: Commitment phobia

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delete reply lyonlionel wrote on Jan 17, '05 so this is what i am going through now too perhaps.

delete reply andytiong wrote on Jan 17, '05 nice quote ......... I am not sceptical with the quote as it's nothing but the truth .

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 17, '05 haha.. true true.. me, having part of the problem or dillema too. anyweis.. take care.. and good luck for dr wong's paper

delete reply banana2 wrote on Jan 17, '05 better day will only arrive after dr tang paper... a typical life of a person after undergoing the "standardization" and "labelling" by the society. "flawed" product is what we get.

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 18, '05 this time i not agree with you....live out the spirit as inherited in you...why should we must mold by the society?? just be your selves!

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 18, '05, edited on Jan 18, '05 ahlok2003 said this time i not agree with you....live out the spirit as inherited in you...why should we must mold by the society?? just be your selves! that's the tough part of it, living in an influencing world without losing yourself. can't deny the fact that all of us are molded and shaped into a person to be fit in the environment and society we have today... pathetic...what you consider yourself as 'unique' or 'character' sometime is seen as 'alien' by others... 永远生活在他人眼光之下 (T.T)

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 18, '05, edited on Jan 18, '05 as in the picture...and phrases suggest.. you will be the one to be controlled or the one who control...choice is always in your hand, future also determine by one...the only person who can change everything is the creator. Other than that...most of the time you need control ourselves....and be yourselves. what people said on us, we only consider not follow...if not we will control by their thinking...or we will just draw a boundary in boundless...

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 18, '05, edited on Jan 19, '05 had not you ever felt that sometimes, there is no one to be trusted or hold upon, no one to be there when you need them, because of the lost of confidence in them...but all you have is only you yourself? it is not a matter of being influence or not. it is the matter of belongingness... where u feel that you do not belong to either the society or the world.. it is the feeling of loneliness when there is no one there...no one to be trusted... the feeling of insecure because everyone seems to be selfish and no longer be those you trusted... it is the feeling of emptiness... well, so long that i can describe...

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 18, '05 tammy..dun quote my reply if you not discussing what i said... haha..because u r talking different thing...??!! ya...

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 18, '05 duh.......

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 18, '05, edited on Jan 18, '05 pohmui said had not you ever felt that sometimes, there is no one to be trusted or hold upon, no one to be there when you need them, because of the lost of confidence in them...but all you have is only you yourself? it is not a matter of being influence or not. it is the matter of belongingness... where u feel that you do not belong to either the society or the world.. it is the feeling of loneliness when there is no one there...no one to be trusted... the feeling of insecure because everyone seems to be selfish and no longer be those you trusted... it is the feeling of emptiness... well, so long that i can describe... tammy, well, sometime gals are a lil' bit more sensual and sensitive compare to guys (no offense,k?) well, sometime i also had that kind of feeling, the sense of emptiness, being hypocrate... But then, what i must say is we had to accept that this is the world that we are living in now, happy or not you still have to go on with life, so,we might as well learn to live to the fullest. The truth of life, about belonginess, purpose of life... will only be crystal clear as you walk down this road of life... so, don't give up, i'm sure you'll find your inner strength and self identity one day...

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 19, '05 its ok.. no offense. sometimes the feeling do run through my mind but.. what i will do is to live life the happiest i can. no point being sad everytime.. life is just too short to be sad for long. i cant stop being sensual or sensitive sometimes, but, what to do.. be happy then..

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 19, '05 oh...gals....dun feel insecure! guys here to protect you all.... haha.......

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 19, '05 sometimes guys do hurt girl's feeling accidentally.. :p

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 19, '05 allah...only guys hurt gals?? wondering...

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 19, '05 sometimes girls hurt guys too... haha...

delete reply banana2 wrote on Jan 19, '05 try to find "the person that's just for u" [phrase adapted from chobits] lo, won't feel insecure anymore. do u all notice a trend? when the replies are too many, the topic of interest usually is not of the original article, but something else.

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 19, '05 cool observation...

delete reply banana2 wrote on Jan 18, '05 ahlok2003 said this time i not agree with you....live out the spirit as inherited in you...why should we must mold by the society?? just be your selves! oh ah lok, i was stating what the article is going to say lah, that's not my opinion ler

delete reply vrdacosta wrote on Jan 18, '05 In the text we can read: ". ...You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. ...". And about you, what would you say!... Do you feel insecure?

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 19, '05 vrdacosta said In the text we can read: ". ...You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now. ...". And about you, what would you say!... Do you feel insecure? insecurity... i am...

delete reply eugenetwj wrote on Jan 19, '05 So what do you think about the Chobits anime? :D

delete reply banana2 wrote on Jan 20, '05, edited on Jan 20, '05 nice, worth spending two nights watching it : )

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 20, '05 y do u all nid to "owiz" change topic?

delete reply banana2 wrote on Jan 20, '05 pohmui said y do u all nid to "owiz" change topic? this is the "custom" of the fellow mutiply members.

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 20, '05 yeh right... good 'custom' right?

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 20, '05 norm and culture indeed..haha..cheer

What kind of soul are you

You Are a Hunter Soul

You are driven and ambitious - totally self motiviated to succeed Actively working to acheive what you want, you are skillful in many areas. You are a natural predator with strong instincts ... and more than a little demanding. You are creative, energetic, and an extremely powerful force. An outdoors person, you like animals and relate to them better than people. You tend to have an explosive personality, but also a good sense of humor. People sometimes see you as arrogant or a know it all. You tend to be a bit of a loner, though you hate to be alone. Souls you are most compatible with: Seeker Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

i'm a predator,a hunter soul... hehe... always hunt for something... so who's my prey? p/s: Try this out and tell me what kind of soul are you.

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delete reply vrdacosta wrote on Jan 12, '05 You Are a Peacemaker Soul You strive to please others and compromise anyway you can. War or conflict bothers you, and you would do anything to keep the peace. You are a good mediator and a true negotiator. Sometimes you do too much, trying so hard to make people happy. While you keep the peace, you tend to be secretly judgmental. You lose respect for people who don't like to both give and take. On the flip side, you've got a graet sense of humor and wit. You're always dimplomatic and able to give good advice. Souls you are most compatible with: Warrior Soul, Hunter Soul and Visionary Soul What Kind of Soul Are You?

delete reply craziivan wrote on Jan 12, '05 You Are a Retrospective Soul The most misunderstood of all the soul signs. Sometimes you even have difficulty seeing yourself as who you are. You are intense and desire perfection in every facet of your life. You're best described as extremely idealistic, hardworking, and a survivor. Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily. But if you aren't careful, you'll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes. For you, it is difficult to seperate the past from the present. You will suceed once you overcome the disappoinments in life. Souls you are most compatible with: Traveler Soul and Prophet Soul What Kind of Soul Are You?

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 12, '05 craziivan said You Are a Retrospective Soul The most misunderstood of all the soul signs. Sometimes you even have difficulty seeing yourself as who you are. You are intense and desire perfection in every facet of your life. You're best described as extremely idealistic, hardworking, and a survivor. Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily. But if you aren't careful, you'll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes. For you, it is difficult to seperate the past from the present. You will suceed once you overcome the disappoinments in life. Souls you are most compatible with: Traveler Soul and Prophet Soul What Kind of Soul Are You? yup, you are extremely idealistic....

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 13, '05, edited on Jan 22, '05 You Are a Warrior Soul You're a strong person and sometimes seen as intimidating. You don't give up. You're committed and brave. Truly adventuresome, you are not afraid of going to battle. Extremely protective of loved ones, you root for the underdog. You are picky about details and rigorous in your methods. You also value honesty and fairness a great deal. You can be outspoken, intimidating, headstrong, and demanding. You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others. Souls you are most compatible with: Old Soul and Peacemaker Soul What Kind of Soul Are You?

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 14, '05 ahlok2003 said i'm Warrior Soul You're a strong person and sometimes seen as intimidating. You don't give up. You're committed and brave. Truly adventuresome, you are not afraid of going to battle. Extremely protective of loved ones, you root for the underdog. You are picky about details and rigorous in your methods. You also value honesty and fairness a great deal. You can be outspoken, intimidating, headstrong, and demanding. You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others. "You are picky about details and rigorous in your methods You can be outspoken, intimidating, headstrong, and demanding. You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others." i love these line, it sounds so LIKE you....

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 14, '05 atlantisian said "You are picky about details and rigorous in your methods You can be outspoken, intimidating, headstrong, and demanding. You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others." i love these line, it sounds so LIKE you.... yes..i think so...! quite accurate. but among them..the most i like is this "You're a hardliner who demands the best from themselves and others"..... this make me hard to 'survive' in real world....finally i give up!

delete reply eugenetwj wrote on Jan 19, '05 And for me, "You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you." should be the best part. Hehehehe~

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 19, '05 eugenetwj said And for me, "You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you." should be the best part. Hehehehe~ o please lar eugene... okok... EveRybody LOves EugEne...

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 20, '05 atlantisian said o please lar eugene... okok... EveRybody LOves EugEne... it feels like so hard to say this words.. love eugene.. umph..

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 20, '05 dun worry eugene ..at least i LOVE you....

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 13, '05 You Are a Retrospective Soul The most misunderstood of all the soul signs. Sometimes you even have difficulty seeing yourself as who you are. You are intense and desire perfection in every facet of your life. You're best described as extremely idealistic, hardworking, and a survivor. Great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you easily. But if you aren't careful, you'll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes. For you, it is difficult to seperate the past from the present. You will suceed once you overcome the disappoinments in life. Souls you are most compatible with: Traveler Soul and Prophet Soul What Kind of Soul Are You?

delete reply eugenetwj wrote on Jan 13, '05 You Are a Dreaming Soul Your vivid emotions and imagination takes you awy from this world So much so that you tend to live in your head most of the time You have great dreams and ambitions that could be the envy of all... But for you, following through with your dreams is a bit difficult You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you. Forgiving and tolerant, you see the world through rose colored glasses. Underneath it all, you have a ton of passion that you hide from others. Always hopeful, you tend to expect positive outcomes in your life. Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul, Prophet Soul, and Traveler Soul What Kind of Soul Are You?

delete reply eugenetwj wrote on Jan 13, '05 Wah very accurate one leh. This one good... im gonna recommend it to others!

delete reply ahlok2003 wrote on Jan 13, '05, edited on Jan 13, '05 eugenetwj said You Are a Dreaming Soul Your vivid emotions and imagination takes you awy from this world So much so that you tend to live in your head most of the time You have great dreams and ambitions that could be the envy of all... But for you, following through with your dreams is a bit difficult You are charming, endearing, and people tend to love you. Forgiving and tolerant, you see the world through rose colored glasses. Underneath it all, you have a ton of passion that you hide from others. Always hopeful, you tend to expect positive outcomes in your life. Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul, Prophet Soul, and Traveler Soul What Kind of Soul Are You? your r a dreamer as i think...haha

delete reply eveec wrote on Jan 14, '05 You Are a Bright Star Soul Like a shining star, you have no trouble being the center of attention In fact, you often feel a bit hurt when all eyes aren't on you You need to be number one in everything, no matter how trivial And it's this ego that both hurts your confidence and helps you acheive You're dramatic and a powerhouse of pure energy You posess a divine quality or uniqueness that's hard to define A natural performer, it's likely you'll become famous in some circles. Just learn not to take everyone's reaction to you so personally! Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul and Prophet Soul What Kind of Soul Are You?

delete reply eveec wrote on Jan 14, '05 oohh thats weird..cant say i totally agree with that but maybe i have just discovered some stuff bout myself that i dint know =O

delete reply pohmui wrote on Jan 20, '05 eveec said You Are a Bright Star Soul Like a shining star, you have no trouble being the center of attention In fact, you often feel a bit hurt when all eyes aren't on you You need to be number one in everything, no matter how trivial And it's this ego that both hurts your confidence and helps you acheive You're dramatic and a powerhouse of pure energy You posess a divine quality or uniqueness that's hard to define A natural performer, it's likely you'll become famous in some circles. Just learn not to take everyone's reaction to you so personally! Souls you are most compatible with: Newborn Soul and Prophet Soul What Kind of Soul Are You? any plan joining the circus?

delete reply eveec wrote on Jan 22, '05 ehh!! better keep my autograph...later i become famous then you can sell it! aha=P

delete reply banana2 wrote on Jan 22, '05, edited on Jan 22, '05 You Are a Prophet Soul You are a gentle soul, with good intentions toward everyone. Selfless and kind, you have great faith in people. Sometimes this faith can lead to disappoinment in the long run. No matter what, you deal with everything in a calm and balanced way. You are a good interpreter, very sensitive, intuitive, caring, and gentle. Concerned about the world, you are good at predicting people's feelings. A seeker of wisdom, you are a life long learner looking for purpose and meaning. You are a great thinker and communicator, but not necessarily a doer. Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul What Kind of Soul Are You? haha, it is quite accurate to some extent.

edit delete reply atlantisian wrote on Jan 22, '05 banana2 said You Are a Prophet Soul You are a gentle soul, with good intentions toward everyone. Selfless and kind, you have great faith in people. Sometimes this faith can lead to disappoinment in the long run. No matter what, you deal with everything in a calm and balanced way. You are a good interpreter, very sensitive, intuitive, caring, and gentle. Concerned about the world, you are good at predicting people's feelings. A seeker of wisdom, you are a life long learner looking for purpose and meaning. You are a great thinker and communicator, but not necessarily a doer. Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul What Kind of Soul Are You? haha, it is quite accurate to some extent. "You are a gentle soul, with good intentions toward everyone. " This quote suit you, although i didn't know you very well, but from first impression, you are really gentle and modest. anyway, why i haven't find someone that has the some hunter soul as me huh...