Wedding is way overated

Time for a little complaining.

Along the process of wedding preparation, one thing which I'm constantly frustrated about is the people's general perception towards wedding.

For simplicity, i would called the so called generally stereotyped weddings as celebrity wedding, while mine which is less extravagant and simple as my humble wedding. Apparently, not all, but some who doubted peter and my decision for a humble wedding. For example, during the course of wedding preparation, we were being bombarded endlessly by questions such as "are you serious of not serving any alcohol?", "what about speech?""why there is no reception dinner/tea ceremony/ chip san leong?", "you got no money is it?" etc.

Let me emphasize this before i continue, this is purely my PERSONAL opinion, so it does not conform to the general opinion of how wedding should be. And i am relief that the other person who is integral in this wedding is 100% in tune with me. PERSONALLY, i believe that wedding is the occasion where the couple come together as one, and it is a special moment for the couple to celebrate and sharing their joy with their love ones. On the other hand, wedding frills and favors are secondary, am not saying that its not necessary, but i would say that its not that important compare to the focus of the wedding, which is the couple themselves. The frills follows the ceremony for obvious reasons, as it contributes to the entire ambiance and good feelings of the wedding. However, with or without the frills, extravagant or not, all the wedding are of the same purpose and it should brings equal sheer happiness to the couple as well as the witness who shared the happiness of the couple.

Most of us, have certain level of "wedding indoctrination" buried deep within, i.e. designer dress, expensive wines, wedding banquets etc. Frankly, i'm the lone ranger here, fighting the Goliath celebrity wedding 'system' which was deep rooted in any culture or society. I blame it to media influence OR ..... its sheer vanity.

Well, all i can say is that its unavoidable that there are expectations from many, however in the end of the day its up to me and Peter to keep it in perspective.

I guess you got the point now, other wise dont blame me if i turn into bridezilla k.

Indifferent

I was running on the treadmill in the gymn yesterday, when i watched the videos of Japan's Tsunami from the CNN channel for the first time since the sad incident happened on last Friday.

I was frightening beyond relief, one of the survivor said. I have no words. When he saw his wife swept away by the tide.

And i continue to run, and run, but my heart become so heavy that at one point, i need to decrease the running speed in order to pant, not because of the physical tiredness, but because of the sadness i felt so deep til it choked my lungs.

It really doesn't matter what language they speaks, the tears was the universal language, and i understand it. It really doesnt matter how many thousand of kilometers away they are from me, the sadness is mutual, and i really felt it.

And i felt even more sad because i am here, running on a treadmill, paying gymn membership so that i can keep my weight; while people on the other side of the earth, running for the lives, can't even purchase a single piece of bread even though they have the money. I can hear the sound of tears and the newscasters from my earphones, at the same time, i heard the sound of laughters and chattering from the surrounding of the gymn.

Its an ironic.

Some had just lost their lives.
There are some others live their lives as though they are in full control.

In a way, i am helpless. I don't want to register myself as one of the crowds who continue to live their lives irrespective of what is happening on the other side of the earth. I don't want to be acting indifferent as though the thousands lives that were lost during that day has nothing to do with me.

Yet, what can i do?

It reminds me the message i heard last week in church.

Luke 7:31-32: “To what, then, can I compare the people of this generation? What are they like? They are like children sitting in the marketplace and calling out to each other:
We played the flute for you, and you did not dance;
we sang a dirge, and you did not cry.’

How true is the word of God, how did the people of this generation act? Indifferent. They don't want to participate in the joyful celebration, nor they want to mourn and cry for others lost. Are we indifferent to other's pain? Do we share the joy of others? and the most important question is do we even care about others or we just shut our eyes and focus on our self interest?

Is our heart so shallow and only concern about our own well being that we choose to be ignorant and blinded towards things which happens to others, things which happen around us.

And the question come back to me. What can i do?

I don't have any answer. And i continue to run.

It has been 2 weeks

I have so much to write but so little time. The reality slowly dawned on me, that its officially less than 4 months now.

Peter and I were ambitious. We planned to finish all the necessary preparation within 1 month, then we gonna goyang kaki sampai patah for the next 3 months til the BIG day comes. And i seriously thought i'm gonna be able to achieve that. Whats so hard about wedding preparation, with my speed and his attention to details, of course we can glide to our big day effortlessly. Because of the great ambition, we have been rushing to get done as much things as possible for the past 2 weeks. So for two weekends consecutively, we have been running all over the places, meeting all sorts of people, calling and emailing all the vendors.

Boy, it was tired. Very very tired but i have to say that we managed it alright. Since the day we have the confirmed date in hand, things has been progressing, slowly but surely. Just to recap the things which we have settled:

1. Booked the church, went through 2 sessions with the priest and the secretary separately
2. Booked the restaurant for lunch reception, have a good food tasting session with one of our best man
3. Finalized and got all the helpers for the church services
4. Bought the wedding program cover and got the Church service program all drawn out
5. Went for a 1 day makeup course and going for another bridal makeup trial on coming Saturday.
6. Bought my wedding gown, heels, and his full suit
7. Booked with a florist for my bridal bouquet and his buttonhole
8. Booked my family's Kuching-KL air tickets
9. Bought the dress for my bridesmaid and ties for the best men
10. Redo my car deco to suit my color theme (am not gonna show anything here, if you are interested then come to see on the day itself. wuahaha... )

However on the other side of the stories, with Peter's fussyness and me being anal, we keep going back and forth on some of our decision. Just to name a few of those pending:

1. Went to a few wedding card printing shop, still couldnt decide the design which i like the most
2. Met 2 photographers after screening through all the portfolios and quotations, but still couldnt decide on which one to engage with.
Vendor 1
Vendor 2
3. Wedding door gifts *secret *
4. Flower girl's dress (flower girls are busier than me, exam kononnya)
5. Makeup artist
.......

Anyway, 2 weeks to go to achieve our goal to goyang kaki!